13 June 2011

Something Wonderful

It would appear that while I was in hospital something truly wonderful happened to this fair nation of ours, a sign, if ever one was needed, that the doom and gloom of our long national nightmare might just be at an end, and an eternal summer of sunshine and sprinkles may just be over the horizon.

This, my friends, is Mountain Dew. Irish Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew brewed, bottled or possibly just distributed here in Ireland.


As long-time readers will know, my time in the States left me with two unhealthy addictions, the Green Bay Packers and Mountain Dew, both courtesy of Mr Tim. Since returning home in 2004 I have at various times ordered it by the case online, supped it surreptitiously for breakfast in Poland, or had friends bring it over from the US in their hand-luggage. And now, after almost seven years, it is finally available over the counter here.

This reminds me of my great American Smithwicks adventure. Before I went to the US I was a Smithwicks drinker, and could never find it, or Kilkenny, in any bar I went to in the States. After a few attempts to import quantities purely for personal use ended with tragic consequences, I gave up on ever quaffing its amber goodness again. Then two days before I returned home to Ireland, it magically appeared in one of our local Irish bars, but by that stage I had lost the taste for it. I never touched the stuff again.

I mention this anecdote here because, in a rain on your wedding day moment of irony, Mountain Dew finally arrived in Ireland while I was in hospital for pancreatitis. That would be the pancreatitis that has forcibly removed both caffeine and carbonated beverages from my diet for at least the next six months, if not forever.


I am unable therefore to tell you how the taste compares to the real thing, but a quick glance at the ingredients shows a distinct lack of either high fructose corn syrup or brominated vegetable oil. It almost sounds healthy. Except for children and pregnant women, neither of whom are advised to drink it. Yes, Irish Mountain Dew comes with a health warning.

That makes me want it even more.

Damn you Pancreas, damn you all to hell!



At 9:58 pm, Blogger Aidan said...

What kind of man loses his pancreas and his first "woe betide me" post his is lament is the inability to drink "mountain dew"

What kind of man does this? Honestly? What. Kind. Of. Man?

Oh wait, a Smithwicks drinker you say?

Carry on.

At 11:50 am, Blogger Unkie Dave said...

The days have long gone when I would consider myself a "drinker". When asked by the doctors how much alcohol I consumed in a month I was hard pressed to think of a recent month where I had anything more than 5-10 units in the entire month. I had made the inevitable transition from quantity to quality, preferring a single bottle of bottle-conditioned, oak-cask ale of a winter's evening to a night on the town with pints of dishwater. To be told that I may never drink again is not that huge a loss really.

Coffee and carbonated beverages now, that's a different matter entirely.

At 1:27 am, Blogger Aidan said...

Still. Mountain Dew?

That whole Mountain Dew or Crab Juice bit in the Simpsons is very apt.

To be honest as someone sharing your boat somewhat, I really couldn't do without Sparkling Water, Fentiman's collection of beverages or San Pellegrino's lemonade, before I cursed the lack of mountain dew.

But I do share your pain.

To a small degree.

At 2:09 pm, Blogger Felix said...

I cannot handle the thought of life without regional, fine, hand-crafted ALES.

I could live forever without lager, or cocktails, or spirits (as long as SLOE GIN was still allowed...)

I freely admit that I shall probably never hanker for or want MOUNTAIN DEW, but for the purposes of this discussion, let us imagine that it is for you what ALE is to me, and then I can share your pain a bit.

but COFFEE? No COFFEE? Now I am totally commiserating. You have my deepest condolences.

At 2:38 pm, Blogger Unkie Dave said...

@Aidan - good advice on the water, but at the minute sparkling water is up their with carbonated beverages, my system can't handle the fizz, man.

@felix - I have a weakness for ales, particularly Innis&Gunne limited editions, Ola Dubh and Fuller's special reserve, often a christmas present to myself. All about the quality, not the quantity, a single bottle on a long winter's night with a good book is just heaven, but alas no more.

I find I miss the morning cappuccino more, not from the lack of caffeine, more from the morning ritual of rising, imbibing and slowly catching up on the days news.

Glad to hear from you btw, coincidently enough I was just listening to some of your recent soundscapes on Soundcloud yesterday, particularly the pecha-kucha, and loved the accompanying photo-essay on your website.


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